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Brandi love

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To what do I owe the honor of this visit?

My husband is thankfully dead.

My brother, captured by some sort of mute half-man, half-woman *****.

And my son.

My son needs to be kicked in the balls at least a dozen times.

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Well, surely it can't be as bad as all that.

Now the people are uprising because Stark is dead,

and Arya, that asexual cunt, is missing.

And of course there's that dragon bitch in Qarth.

Dragons? Really?

Dragons are a big thing these days.

And I can't remember half of the characters because all of their names sound the same.

That's fine.

And we keep hearing, "Winter is coming."

Can these people say anything else, ever?

My husband's motto is, "Listen to the love of cock."

I don't know. My great-grandmother chose it.

And my midget brother just married Sansa Stark.

Sansa? Even I can't stand her, and now she's part of the family?

Can you imagine all those Christmas dinners?

What were we thinking?

What the fuck is Christmas?

Varys, I need to get fucked.

Well, why didn't you say so?

I thought you were a eunuch.

Well, if I didn't keep this a secret, I wouldn't get any work done.

Oh my god.

Mmmmm.

My god.

Oh, so good with the tongue.

Very good.

Very good work.

On your feet.

Oh yes.

Oh, yes.

How's this for a royal blowjob?

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