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I've learned a new skill

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So I learnt something very interesting the other day.

I've just been on an NLP course.

I don't know if you retards out there know what that means.

It's Neuro Linguistic Programming.

And what that means is that I can get deep and deeper into your subconscious mind

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and I can influence what's going on out there

and what you believe about me, about the world

and let's be honest about it, you're placing it under my feet.

So I'm going to do something very, very generous.

And usually what you might do in an NLP session

is teach someone to stop smoking, to lose weight or enhance their confidence.

I'm actually going to do something completely different

and you're going to love every single moment of it.

So look into my eyes, look into my eyes.

No, not at my arse, not at my tits, not around my eyes but into my eyes.

There you go, you're under.

So what you're going to do while you're under my spell

is you're going to get out your little credit card

and you're going to give me some very, very important numbers.

Some very, very important details.

I need the long card number, I need your name,

I need the security code and I need the billing address.

Are you giving that to me right now?

Let me just write that down, let me recall that in my subconscious mind.

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