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Lady of the Rings

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Oh, don't scold me, Mr. Soto. It's May Day after all.

Yes, I suppose it does come to that.

And you know how it is with the Tibets. As soon as the springtime comes,

I made this for you.

It's Mayday! Come!

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That's my sweet meat.

It's been a long time and you were just a *****.

It was when your aunt and Dildo Buggins went away.

You're not.

The Great Wizard!

Once upon a time they called me "Bindolf the Beige".

So I might become master of all wizards, like Salmon Man, the master of my clan, but...

Well, Sauron, how are you?

Well, thank you. It's been an exciting day.

Yes, May Day. I know, I know.

I don't know, country folk are strange people. They all seem to like sex.

And hibbits like it more than most.

You really are the horniest little race in outer earth.

No one seems to fuck or suck cum like a hibbit.

It's true.

My Aunt Dildo used to say that hibbits may be sex crazy,

but they're certainly not.

My time is short, Soto. Do you know what that ring is?

No.

This is the One Ring. The Ring of Power.

Long ago I suspected it. Your Aunt Bildo left because she feared it also.

Lately, there have been rumors happening on Outer Earth that make me fear that the Dark Master has reawakened from a ***** of ages.

That he is bent on restoring his power.

...

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