New gas right FM14
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I'm Bruce Johnson and I'm an inventor.
I came up with the idea for Breathe Right, you know those nasal strips that you stick
on your nose to prevent you from *******?
Breathe Right became so popular that I started to think, "Well, what else can I invent?"
As I was in bed racking my brain, inspiration struck.
And then it hit me.
******* isn't the only thing that can keep people up at night.
So can a sudden, noisy eruption.
Bruce!
Well, not anymore.
Thanks to my new Gas Right Adhesive Strips.
Now I know you know this, but just to explain, a noise occurs when a propulsion of gas shoots
between the butt cheeks, causing them to slam together.
Using the same concept as my nasal strips, I invented a larger side effect that is applied
to the outside of the butt.
The Gas Right Strip spreads the cheeks apart for a wider, more direct passageway.
You hear that?
Silence.
With Gas Right Posterior Strips, you'll always get a full night's sleep.
Well, at least one of you will.
By the way, you can't really tell, but I'm farting right now.
The crew knows it though, right guys?
Gas Right Posterior Strips.
They spread your butt cheeks apart.
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